


got it bad

by WattStalf



Series: Mentoring [1]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: M/M, Masturbation, and im still going to hell, and peter is still underage, its not smutty but its still filthy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-25
Updated: 2016-05-25
Packaged: 2018-06-10 14:06:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6960115
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WattStalf/pseuds/WattStalf
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>He was certainly smart enough to be able to put two and two together, and realize what it meant when it was late and he couldn't sleep because a certain someone was on his mind.</p><p>Takes place immediately before firsts.</p>
            </blockquote>





	got it bad

**Author's Note:**

> IT'S THE PREQUEL TO MY SIN  
> because i wanted to do it i guess  
> my sinful hands just keep working  
> 

Peter wasn't stupid, not by any stretch of the imagination. He wasn't stupid, and even in categories where he did not have much experience, he could still understand the basics, or at least enough to know what _he_ was experiencing. Maybe he didn't know enough about romance to be able to get a date, and maybe he didn't know enough about attraction to make himself attractive to anyone, but he knew his own feelings, at the very least.

He was certainly smart enough to be able to put two and two together, and realize what it meant when it was late and he couldn't sleep because a certain someone was on his mind. And he realized what it meant that he was sweating and couldn't stop fidgeting, and he realized what it meant when he eventually found himself jacking off with that person in mind. He wasn't so stupid that he could ignore that, no matter how impossible it seemed, he was really, really into that person.

But he supposed he had to be a little bit stupid to be into Tony Stark. Not because it made no sense to be attracted to him, but because it made no sense for  _him_ to be attracted to him. Not with what they had, not when Tony was the mentor he'd been looking for, the person who could really help him get somewhere in life. Tony had been the first person to really see him, for everything that he was, and maybe that was where all of this came from, but that didn't make it any more excusable.

He didn't even know what this meant for him, anyway. It was the first time he had ever thought of any man like that, and even if Tony was considered attractive by many, it still came as a surprise that Peter agreed. Did this make him bisexual? If so, he supposed that really didn't matter, but it took him surprise nonetheless. And what exactly were his feelings?

Did he just desire Tony on a really basic, teenage lust-y level, or was he so pathetic that he had a crush on the man, just because he was nice to him or whatever? He knew that he wanted the man, but he couldn't tell how much further it went beyond that. There was a lot of admiration for Tony, that had been there since before they had met, even, but there were feelings beyond that were hard to read. Peter had had his fair share of crushes before, and this had a few of the symptoms, but he wasn't quite able to work out what it all meant.

All he really knew was that he was kept up all night wondering what it would feel like to do something- anything- with someone like that. Really, he wondered what it would be like with anyone. He'd kissed a girl, once, but that was it, and he'd figured it'd be years before he'd ever go any further. Now, he found himself feeling as though he would die if he didn't have Tony Stark soon, and his nights were spent clumsily finishing himself off to whatever semi-scandalous photos he could find. He couldn't even attempt to deny that he had it bad.

But what was there he could to do about it? Tony was much too old for him, and he knew that. There was no way the man would consider anything with him, and even if he did, what could they really do? It was all kinds of illegal, even if Peter knew that  _he_ wouldn't feel like he was being taken advantage of. Besides all of that, this just wasn't how things worked. Tony was his mentor, the man helping him become a better hero, under the guise of helping him become better with a whole manor of other things. And, really, they were doing that too and it was more than just a cover.

The worst was when he actually got to spend time with Tony, when they worked together and their hands would accidentally brush and he would feel like a schoolboy- which, he technically was- and try to hide his blush. When Tony would compliment something that he did and he would feel like the most important person in the world, when Tony would give him that look that made him feel like he could accomplish anything. That was when he really did think that maybe his feelings went beyond lust and that he was falling head over heels for this man, but that was not to say that his lust was no longer present.

In fact, it was often the only thing he could think about, and there were so many times he had to try to angle himself to hide a growing erection, until he could calm himself down and get it under control. Once, he even excused himself to the bathroom, and the humiliation of what he was doing actually made it easier to get off, knowing that Tony was so close, that he was doing this in  _his_ bathroom. It was so much more than he could handle, and it was honestly inevitable that one day, even someone as smart as Peter would fall victim to his own lust, would be unable to think his way around the things his body was demanding he do.

All the time he spent alone with Tony, with so little physical space between them, but so much saying that he couldn't pursue it just built up, until the physical space seemed to be all that he really needed to worry about, and that was something he could conquer easily. That was nothing, and that was all that was  _really_ separating him from Tony. If he really wanted to, he knew that he could at least make a move. Whatever happened from there was beyond his control, but he was getting so desperate that he knew that he would at least have to try.

“If there's anything else I can do for you, just let me know.” Tony didn't mean what Peter wanted him to mean by that; he was only offering to supply further projects, not offering himself as an outlet for Peter's sexual and maybe-romantic tension. But it was the opening Peter was looking for, even if it wasn't an opening at all, and he had lost the ability to think clearly around the older man a long time ago.

He went for a kiss, and it was stiff and it was quick and it was probably the most awkward thing Peter had ever experienced, and that was saying something, considering he was in high school and all. But it was a kiss nonetheless, and whatever happened from here on out, his intentions were made clear, and he waited for some sort of reaction from Tony, whether it was being thrown out or being pulled in for another kiss.

He got neither of those; instead, Tony asked him what the hell he was thinking.

“I was thinking that I wanted to do that,” he said, already knowing that he was about to start rambling, but unable to stop it. “I've really been wanting to for a while, but I didn't think I could until I just kind of realized that nothing was stopping me. At least, nothing was stopping me from doing that, even if nothing else happens, and at least, you know, I tried?”

“You have no idea what you're getting into with that, and I don't even know where you'd get any sort of idea like this in the first place, but-”

Before he had even finished speaking, Peter had managed to read Tony's face and begin to figure out how he was feeling about this. He was surprised, a little upset, but mostly guilty, and that was what stuck out the most, because guilt implied that he thought he was doing something wrong. Which meant that he either wanted this or felt bad for not wanting this, and either way, that meant he felt  _something_ positive toward Peter, and that was enough to work with. Persuasion wasn't something that Peter was used to, or particularly good at, and the fact that everything he'd learned about it had come from Tony meant it might not work, but he was already forming sentences in his head, wanting more than anything to get his way, just this once.

“You've already taught me so much,” he said. “I've just never...I mean, you know what it's like at my age, right? And things have been so confusing lately, and I just wanted to see...wanted a little experience? I don't know anybody else I can go to about something like this.”

“Jesus, kid,” Tony said, “couldn't you have just asked for pointers?”

“I don't think that would really satisfy my curiosity.” His desperation had made him determined, and so Peter found himself sounding just a bit more confident than he was used to. Perhaps he wasn't so bad at persuasion at all, and perhaps he was better at getting his way than he thought. But then Tony looked at him in an entirely new way, in a way that Peter could read well enough to know that he'd won, and he realized that getting Tony to understand and agree was only half the battle.

He kept his hands in his pockets the entire way to the man's office, nervously scratching at his thumbnails with his index fingers, making a few remarks here or there that were often shushed. This was supposed to be a secret, after all, and then the doors shut behind him, and he knew that there was no way out for him. Maybe Tony would have given him one, but he wouldn't allow himself to take it; he was going to follow through with this.

"This is crazy. This is so crazy, right?"

 


End file.
